Animals of October

I have a very dominating sweet tooth. I think its the molar behind the right incisor, who sits a little back from the others. It lurks in soft-palate shadows, whispering at the other teeth; a slice of that cake, a biscuit or two, oooh fizzy sweets! It was my last major barrier before going full vegan, although it turns out veganism went full-blown sweet tooth at around the same time I turned, so it didn't turn out to be much of a problem. But back in 2015, when I was taking that step from veggie to veegz, cornershop chocolate bars were my failing, particularly Snickers and Twixes. I had already discovered the M&S veggie Percy Pig sweets, so that satisfied the fruity chew craving, but the prospect of not being able to nip to the shop for a Double Decker was surprisingly powerful. But then I told myself to stop being such a whiny little dick-splash and, besides, we’d discovered Vegos and Mini-Moos to sate the chocolate pangs, and a local deli did the absolute bestest vegan cakes...

I always intended to use this blog for fictional as well as non-fictional writings, so here’s the first attempt at a little story-tale. For guidance, I asked Twitter to supply me with numbers to lead me to an entry in The Element Encyclopedia of Magical Creatures by John & Caitlin Matthews, which I have here on my desk. Grace Fletcher-Hackwood (@msgracefa) and Jo Howard (@joannuski) were the first to respond, selecting Cacus; a fearsome half-spider, half-human, three-headed beast from Greek mythology, and Adar Llwch Gwin; some mighty giant birds from Welsh mythology, whose name translates to 'Dustwine' (for some unexplained reason). The following tale is the result of this mythic mash-up. Big thanks to Grace and Jo!   Quite the Monster?   One head for talking, one for eating, and one for breathing fire. And so, if you cared or dared to look dearest Hercules, that means three entirely different throat structures and, I expect, three separate stomachs; one shriveled...